10 Ways to Become a smurf:

 1.  Hold your breath until you turn blue.

 2.  Shrink until you're only three apples high (that one might be tricky)

 3.  Build a mushroom hut at the base of a great oak

 4.  Replace every verb with the word "smurf"

 5.  Develop an obsessive compulsive disorder that's so bad you get nick named for it.

 6.  Become proficient in Damn Building

 7.  Learn to Ride a very Large Bird

 8.  Remember to never EVER ask where baby and the other 4 young smurflings came from.

 9. Study the great previous escapes from Gargamell and Azreal so that you can survive the Warlock and his Cat

 and last but not least... 

 10.  Hit your local Smurf Gap and stock up on the white tights and matching Hats



I REALLY need to lay off the Boomerang Marathons....